Weddings at Valley Presbyterian Church in Portola Valley

I had a meeting with Cathy, the director at Valley Presbyterian Church in Portola Valley today, for an upcoming wedding that we have there. It's been several years since I had worked at the church, so it was very nice to get reacquainted with it. Nestled amongst redwood trees, this is definitely one of the nicest looking church to get married in. Cathy tells me that they do a lot of destination weddings at the church every year, for couples from Japan and other places around the world. I am not surprised. The floor to ceiling glass windows that make the backdrop for weddings is simply awe-inspiring, especially with the redwoods behind it!

Cathy also excitedly shared with me that the church is ready and eager to marry same sex couples as well, thanks to the Supreme Court rulings this week that legalized gay marriages in California. They hold a very progressive mindset at the church, and is in line with many of us in the wedding industry who is applauding and cheering for the "victory of love," as I like to call it.

I'm reminiscing on the last wedding that we did at Valley Presbyterian Church, for Emily and Leonard. Here's a great shot from Lisa Lefkowitz!

Private Estate Wedding in Napa Valley

Last weekend, our team spent 3 days up in Calistoga for an amazing wedding at a private estate known as Black Swan Lake. 

My iPhone/Instagram photos won't do much justice to this dreamy, picturesque property on Silverado Trail but it will have to do for now, because I'm still over the moon at how beautiful everything was.

You can be sure that I will be sharing ALL the fabulous details to this wedding, including the superb team that I got to work with, when the professional photos from Lisa Lefkowitz are ready.

This ceremony backdrop looked like a postcard!

And here are some behind the scene shots of our team hard at work...

Who Should Officiate Your Wedding?

There are lots of important decisions to be made for a wedding, and one of them includes the decision on whom to select as your Officiant.

If you are getting married at a church, chances are high that you'll be using a Pastor from that particular church, or one that you are close with. If you are having a non-religious ceremony, there are many great non-denominational Officiants who marry couples as their profession, and they will work with couples to guide them in creating a personal ceremony that reflects who they are. However, we are seeing an increased trend couples asking a friend or family member to take on this honorable role.

We were recently interviewed by PopSugar on this topic, and here is the article taken directly from their website:

The wedding ceremony can be overshadowed by the dancing, booze, and food of the reception, but ceremonies truly hold the heart of the big day: it's when the couple officially begins the rest of their lives as spouses. The "I dos" are led by the officiant, and selecting the person responsible for that moment should not be taken lightly. And more and more couples are choosing loved ones for this meaningful duty over clergymen. "In the past few years, we've seen a big surge in the number of couples asking a friend or family member to officiate their wedding," San Francisco wedding planner Jubilee Lau of Jubilee Lau Events told us. "It seems as if the consensus for such a decision is to bring in another layer of personalization to the ceremony." If you're planning on having someone you know officiate your wedding, Jubilee shared five tips:

Dad Might Not Be Best
"Normally, we would advise couples to refrain from asking immediate family members, as sometimes they get too emotional to carry themselves well in front of all the guests," Jubilee notes. But if you or your spouse-to-be has a dad who can handle the responsibility without getting weepy, go for it. Jubilee said they had two weddings recently where the groom's father officiated and the ceremonies were a success.

Public Speaking Skills Matter
It's OK to be picky. This isn't a competition for who you're closest to, it's about who would do the best job. Jubilee adds, "We recommend that they invite someone who is normally a good public speaker (they should be eloquent and articulate), that they feel very comfortable with, and who would have the time and patience to work with them on the ceremony content."

It's More Than a Daylong Commitment
This leads us to Jubilee's next point: "A good officiant does more than just read a script." You need to find someone who's willing to put in the time and effort, not just expect to show up on the big day and say a few words. "He/she should be prepared to spend some time with the couple to understand the elements that they want to bring into the ceremony — religion, families, culture, traditions, etc. — and then help them to incorporate it well." No slackers allowed!

Pair Him/Her Up With a Pro
Chances are that the friend or family member you ultimately choose has little to zilch experience officiating a wedding, and you don't want to be babysitting him or her on what goes into the undertaking. Jubilee offers this solution: "What we've done before is to pair the friend/family member up with a professional officiant, who then helps to write the ceremony. That way, they can properly advise on the content, but the clients still get the benefit of having a close friend officiate on the day of." There may be a fee for the professional (around $300-$500), but it's probably worth it to avoid any major slip-ups.

"Short and Sweet" Doesn't Mean Generic
If you've ever sat through a rushed ceremony, you know that short isn't always better. It can result in everyone at the reception feeling like they're just attending a fancy party, not celebrating a personal, significant joining of two people vowing to spend the rest of their lives together. "Although many nonreligious couples opt for a 'short and sweet' nondenominational ceremony, we always remind them that it should still be meaningful and represent who they are," Jubilee notes. "After all, the ceremony is the core of the reason why everyone is there that day!"

— Additional reporting by Annie Scudder

For one of our 2012 weddings, the groom's father officiated the wedding, and he did a wonderful job!
(Photo by: Gary Ashley)